Last night was the boy’s birthday celebration night. I usually have him spend his actual birthday with just me going to dinner or whatever and then he goes out with his friends on the weekend. Well, this year I decided to surprise him and have all his friends at a certain restaurant waiting for us. First off, he was calling all of them while I was getting dressed to go and telling them all that he wanted to get together on Friday and it would just be me and him for the night. So, they are all getting confused because they remember me calling and saying this night. Ugh. So, I’m in the bathroom with my list of numbers whispering to these people that they need to go anyway. I was trying to distract the boy with anything I could think of. Babe, go feed the dogs. Babe, go get a beer. Babe, bring me my purse. Then, he’s questioning my choice of restaurant and saying that maybe he doesn’t want to go there, why are we getting so dressed up? Can’t he just wear shorts? I had not ever met any of these people cause I’m kind of a snob like that and I really don’t party like they all do, so I wanted to get dressed up so I could make a good first impression. Anyway, long story even longer, we finally get to the restaurant and almost all of them showed up and it was really cool and the boy was stoked. We ate there and DRANK (I don’t usually drink) and then we went to a titty bar. Boy, that was entertainment for real. Today I have a horrible hangover from just three screwdrivers and I just want to go back to bed.

+You may not put the trash bags back in the can after you take it out, but you bring me a blanket when we watch movies.
+You may not know how to fix alot of stuff, but you did sleep on the floor for a week with that puppy when he was so very hurt.
+You may not pick up your dirty clothes off of the floor, but you always smell sooooo good that I can’t stand it.
+You may not help put away the groceries, but you always kiss me goodnight.
+You may not have a car that works very good and it drives me crazy because you won’t get rid of it, but you do call me Turkeyface.
+You make me laugh like no one on this planet. It makes me giddy when I make you laugh just as hard. I try to think of things all day to tell you or text message you just to make you laugh out loud.
+You will be my husband soon enough and I cannot tell you how happy that makes me cause, for one, you’re pretty dang hot.

I have to wait until next year, but I want one so badly. Things have to be lined up so smoothly before I can “get” one. Any guesses on what I am dying to have?

I got this from Yvonne today. Poor dude. Just trying to be a model. With really bad socks and a mullet.

Okay, so I am on the dose of Zoloft that they intend to keep me on from here on out and it’s taking some time to adjust. I was on a super high dose of Effexor and then I tapered down on it and graduated up to this dose on the Zoloft. Only problem is it takes about a month or so until I feel all the way better or whatever.

Phone conversation earlier with some poor lady. Well, kind of out of line lady, but still, I bet i ruined her night.
Me: “Hello?”
Dumb Lady: “You had been online looking for extended warranty information and prices for your F-150 last week and I just wanted to give you those.”
Me: “Um, okay. As long as it’s quick.”
Dumb Lady: “Oh, it’ll just take a few minutes.” (She then proceeds to blab on and on about am I the lien holder, how many miles, blah, and all this info is right in front of her from the online quote that I filled out. So she’s about to repeat it all over again and…)
Me: “You really caught me at a bad time. Could you call me back tomorrow night?” (It was 8:58 and Nip/Tuck was coming on at 9:00)
Dumb Lady: “What’s the hurry? I said that this would just take a few minutes.”
Me::steam coming out of my ears:: “Are you kidding me that you would ask me what I have to go do right this second? What business of it is yours? Maybe I have diarrhea or maybe I’m cooking something and it’s about to burn or maybe I just don’t want to do this right now!”
Dumb Lady: “You are right ma’am. (sounding like a scolded child) Would tomorrow be better?”
Me: (By now Nip/Tuck is starting) “No tomorrow would not be better. I sent you guys my email and if you can harass me there with ads then you certainly can send me the information there too. Please don’t call me again”
Dumb Lady: “Well, I’m sure….
Me: CLICK!

If you have a dumb sense of humor like I do, you’ll like this.

You’re Betty Grable!

What Classic Pin-Up Are You?
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You’re My Little Pony!! Sweet and innocent and
happy, you make people want to spew burrito
chunks. Even a Care Bear could kick your ass.

What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
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So, this is what our house looks like now on the outside. In case it doesn’t really show in the pictures, it’s sort of a greyish color with rust trim and a cream garage door and a stark white front door. Can we say crackheads painted your house? This is what I’m kind of thinking. I want to repaint the whole mofo but I don’t have that kind of money or patience at the current time. What do you all think? Is it way off? The trim has to be creamish because of the beautiful rock accent next to the garage. I don’t know. I’m conflicted. Oh, and my yard doesn’t look that shitty anymore. We fixed it some. And we are yanking those stupid bushes like next week.

Since I started taking anti-depressants like two years ago, I’ve had a hard time “getting there” during sex. I used to do it in like 30 seconds. No joke. So, I went to see my doctor and we’ve been decreasing the amount slowly for the past few weeks. And while I’ve been so cranky that I don’t know why Elbow would want to do me, I’ve gotten my mojo back. Yippy! Since we made up and all that jazz, we’ve been doing it alot. Like every other day. Which is totally alot for a couple that has been together seven years. So my mojo needs to be in tip top condition. Just thought I’d share.

Look at how cute my stencil job in my bedroom turned out. My bestest friend, Sam, came over and we did it last weekend. I’ve had the stencil for months now but since I didn’t like the boy all that much in the past, I kept thinking it wasn’t a good idea. BUT, now that he wants to marry me and we picked out a ring and all that jazz, viola - cute wall.

Apparently, this is considered okay etiquette in my home. These are my brand new sofas, folks. The big one really likes that spot now too.

New cute collars for the doggies. Yippers. Guess which one is my favorite.